Breeder StickersBreeder Stickers

F**k Your Stick Figure Family.

admin — Tue, 05 Feb 2013 20:40:55 +0000

’nuff said.

No Family. Makin’ One.

admin — Tue, 05 Feb 2013 20:35:50 +0000

This guy’s got the right idea. Since he can’t have stick figures of his own – yet – he’s decided to grab his baby momma and start makin’ babies.

Go get ‘em tiger!

Soccer Breeder.

admin — Tue, 24 Jul 2012 16:40:55 +0000

You’ve heard of soccer moms. Ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce you to the soccer breeders.

Well, only one offspring plays soccer. Dad does some sort of messed up surfing. Offspring #1 skis. Offspring #3 has short arms – may be due to inbreeding. Who knows. Prayers go out for the dog and cat.

Beer Guzzlin’ Baby Daddy and His Ho.

admin — Tue, 24 Jul 2012 16:37:52 +0000

We don’t know what to say.

This sticker says it all.

Daddy drinks beer. Ho makes love to daddy. Ho pumps out kids. Daddy rinses and repeats.

Be happy they have an SUV. They need it to carry the offspring and the Miller Lite.

Zombie Family Car Sticker.

admin — Tue, 24 Jul 2012 16:31:19 +0000

Well, we always knew something was wrong with people who put these family stick figure stickers on their car.

We thought they were just people who loved to populate the planet.

We now know they’re zombies.

Zombies who love to have unprotected sex.

Birth Control. Please.

admin — Tue, 24 Jul 2012 16:16:10 +0000

Breeders unite! Those of you who spend Saturday’s at the local wholesale club buying Cherrios in 50-pound sacks and the 200 roll toilet paper packs, rejoice. Here’s a family just like yours.

Pretty soon they’re going to need to start a second line of stick figures if someone doesn’t educate them on the proper use of birth control.

To go along with their passion for procreation, they had to buy the “got kids” sticker too.

With 11 kids and a furry thing, the only thing these parents are missing is a pack of condoms and instructions on how to use them.

Father Wanted. Inquire Within.

admin — Tue, 24 Jul 2012 15:57:07 +0000

What do you do when one breeder leaves the nest?

You put out the call for another sperm donor.

Interested in becoming part of this breeder’s family…. you may have to stand in line as word about this vacancy is spreading fast.

Breeder Sticker Family Photo

admin — Mon, 23 Jul 2012 20:05:24 +0000

Here’s a family of prolific breeders. While they may be good at populating the Earth, they’re not very good at picking out names for their offspring.

Who names their kid Boogers?

This breeder sticker has a dad who looks like the typical schmuck who’s stuck in a 9 to 5 job where he has to wear a tie, while punching the clock to feed Boogers and the rest of the breeder family. He may be a teller at a bank. He may be frustrated in a dead end job. He may just want to end it all. Boogers tend to make you want to do crazy things. Especially if you have one hanging from your nose and you don’t notice it, but the three other people you’re having lunch with can’t stop staring at it.

Sorry, wrong kind of Booger.

Mom on the other hand looks like she’s straight out of a Donna Reed movie. Based on the size of her hips, she’s a good one. She’s definitely not a fan of planned parenthood.

I’m a little confused with Roxy. I tend to think this is not their daughter, but their son who just came out of the closet. Who else would pose like that?

Boogers is, as boogers does. Probably picks her nose and slathers them all over the windows in the car. Too bad there’s not a dog stick figure… he could lick them off.

Alecheetos needs to pick up his pants, unless he wants to be a gangsta. I tend to think someone in this dysfunctional family likes Cheetos. Maybe with a side of boogers.

Mima is the latest one to pop out of Mom’s vagina and hopefully the last. At least she has a somewhat normal name. For a cat.